Thursday, February 11, 2016

No Grits for You!

Photo By sashafatcat

Grits are a fact of life in the South. From Virginia to East Texas, they're part of breakfast-- and sometimes the entirety of breakfast. Every home cooking restaurant serves them, and many fast food places and chain restaurants have them on the menu-- for instance, both Cracker Barrel and IHOP do.

Grits are simply ground up maize (corn). They're of Native American origin and related to corn porridges from around the world-- for example, polenta. In the American South they're not made from dried raw corn, but rather from dried ground hominy. Grits, and for that matter corn meal or hominy, can be made from either yellow or white corn.

(See this article by Linda Brandt for a discussion of grits, polenta, porridge, and mush).


Hominy, for those who might not know, is made from dried corn soaked and heated in an alkaline solution in a process called (no kidding!) nixtamalization; this increases the flavor and aroma of the corn and makes it easier to grind. Most grocery stores in the south and most hispanic groceries in the north sell hominy, which is called posole in Spanish.

Grits come in three varieties:



Instant grits, which should be mixed with hot water and then thrown away;


Quick grits, which cook in five minutes and will do in a pinch;


And grits, which cook in twenty or so minutes.



The hardcore like their grits stone ground.

Grits are, or should be a savory dish. They are served on a plate next to bacon or eggs, or in a bowl. They should never be sweetened, unless that's how your poor old mama made them, in which case it's okay if you use sugar or honey, provided they're for your own consumption. Most Southerners add just salt, pepper, and butter to their grits.

Grits should have the consistency of mashed potatoes; just say no to runny grits.

It's okay to add cheese to grits, or crumbled bacon, or country ham, but baked grits are not a breakfast dish. I've never tasted them, so I'll reserve my opinion on them.

Grits are uncommon in the Northeast. Most people who live north of Maryland have heard of grits and may have even tried them, and most have a negative opinion. I shudder to think of the grits they have tried. Many northerners believe they have led totally gritless lives.


That's not quite true. Corn porridge, mush, and polenta, which are widely consumed above the Mason-Dixon line, are pretty much the same thing. But just try convincing Vinnie of that.

(Grits play a significant role in My Cousin Vinnie. Check this out)


It's fairly difficult to find boxes or bags of grits in grocery stores in New Jersey (usually they carry only instant and/or quick grits) and damn near impossible to find them in restaurants. Diners, which have the world's largest menus, don't serve them. Even Cracker Barrel and IHOP don't seem to have them on its NJ menus.

So, paraphrasing the Soup Nazi, if you're from the South and you find yourself in New Jersey--

No Grits For You!

One Year in Jersey

January 28 marked the one year anniversary of my move to New Jersey. I've been mostly silent on this blog because I wanted to log in some time here before I started commenting much about my new home state. I wanted to know more or less what I was talking about and I figured a year would do it.

So, first upin the next post-- grits

A New Jersey Expert

So, the guy on the right is an expert. And by expert, I mean an expert on everything in a Jersey accent.  Don't believe me? Just ask...